Somewhere Over The Rainbow...

Spring is in the air. The flowers are in full bloom. The colors are engaging and bright and what the f*** were you thinking?

Every Post on this blog begins with the same question...What the hell were you thinking.

This guy just went all out. He couldn't decide what color palette he was choosing from, so he took every single one. After deciding on sherbet ice cream he didn't have time to fix his hair so he threw on a baseball cap..Really? You spend all morning putting together that "David Bromstad" inspired ensemble and you can't do your hair?












Note to self: Red pants are not for the faint of heart.

These last two are not Halloween..
These are real people on real streets, walking around in their real lives..
PS: The little midget to the left of the first picture is actually an adult male. Play on players.

The Places I go..The People I...Wait go back

I really wish I could sit here and say this is strictly about men, women, kids (sorry), shoes, clothes all things Douchie..But I can't. I think Douche of the Day all begins and ends with people...but People actually come up with these names, run these business's and continue to believe in their dreams...So Help Us...

This is a pre-school. A Pre-school where they teach our children..Now I'm not a moron, my child never attended this school for the challenged..but someones kid does, and well I do not seem them growing up to be President of the United States (not that I'd want that job anyways)

If you dont get this let me help..."BJ 99 Cents and Up" What is this the magic spa that is open from 10am to 2am and gives out $5 dollar suckie suckie? No this is a convienent store..uh huh.

I actually have nothing funny to say about this disaster.

This was last Winter..On the BQE- It was the dead of winter..3 Degrees outside..His top is down...Frozen Douche.

Last but not least...

Tough meeting, hop in a cab..This just lightens our day...Thank you New York for making us believe.

Street Walkers....

Riddle me this...You are in public, you are in broad daylight (most of the time), you are sobor (most of the time), yet you insist on walking, talking, acting like a DB.

I am not saying, I am the most coherent, quiet, understated person in the city (by any means), but much like Ricky Ricardo so elegantly said; "Lucy, you've got some 'splainin to do!"

Why is this happening in New Jersey?

This is not a joke. This guy was seriously walking around downtown Jersey City- in Target Bags..He is a real life "DoucheBag"

I am not kidding here either...The Dominican Captain America- Or so he thinks he is.

1- I'm taking the whole "why is this happening in New Jersey comment back"
2- You needed to see this guy as a whole
3- He MacGyvered his backpack, he pegged his pants with rubberbands and he's wearing a helmet..He had no bike.

To the Left To The Left....

Last but not least- Women are not to be discriminated against...It was matching, completely...Down to the shoes and purse...She thought it was runway ready...

Who Runs The World...Girls?

I am a woman..I get it..Women's rights, freedom of speech, empower me, etc. I'm all about being stronger, braver, a fighter, a lover, the nurturing one. But why, oh why must I feel obligated to call these douche bagettes out...Why must I question my womanhood every time I step outside and catch them in the act?

I'm not saying I've never walked around the city, drunk like a fool. But not in broad daylight, crying, getting on the wrong bus, sitting in the middle of a train track, in 4 inch wedge heels and a sagging pooch. I wish I took pictures of her shenanigans...I just got one good picture of her...Thank you St. Patty's day Hoboken 2012. Your the best.

No words..none...not one.

She kept staring, I kept taking pictures.

The guy on the ground to the left...Dying of a heart attack it turns out...She's standing there like she's waiting for her take out.

Just all wrong.....

The Dominican Dolly Parton...Thank you Chicago

Last but not least....

She's pretty normal right...Well she tried to steal my seat, and ended up on the ground..This is her I'm eating shit face after....

The Great Food Debate

Last year on the subway system in New York City, two ladies apparently got into a huge brawl over somebodies left over spaghetti. This fight didn't take place at 3am, but during peak hours...Leave your food, fork, knifes, drinks and take out containers at home.

While the MTA is busy charging us more and more they should really make a law about banning said food, drinks and douches...Well then this blog wouldn't exist would it.

This is no Chocolate Covered Banana....lolol a few of you know what that means.

This is the best picture..3am I am sitting on the train, this guy is eating a sausage sandwich..The entire thing falls out and he sits there and stares at it the length of the ride home...YOU WIN...

HAIR TODAY....GONE TOMORROW


When the temperature is above 60 degrees, when the barometer reads 70% humidity, when the blow dryer and curling iron do nothing to calm my fro...Mufasa takes form on the top of my head.

I readily admit when I have it going on...I actually talk about it frequently so people do not think its purposeful but merely an uncontrollable part of my life.

These people actually have a choice...They sit in the mirror and blow dry their hair every morning..They take a final look and say this is the best I'm going to be today..Then they walk out the door and I am standing there ready and willing to put them in the hall of fame.

I was in the salon watching her get this done..actually

Like a dragons back on her head....

It is wrong no matter how long....

Andrew Dice Clay called...He wants his face back.....

All bad...All day

I thought I said earlier...Mullets were so 27 seconds ago...

Group Douche- You should never be a Douche alone

It's a sad day when I'm on the train, or bus, or walking and I catch a few douchie pictures at random times. It's a sad day when I see the same person twice on different days, and they were douchier then the first time I saw them. In a city of 8 Million people, when I see a group of Douchies...You deserve your very own page.

Its never good to douche alone...

One Douche is never good enough.....

Double Douching makes you stronger.........

Tripod Douching is gang land style..........